Just.. Yeah.

Made it through yesterday with a lot of tears. Things just aren't right without you in the world.  The pain goes through definite waves, it's very hard as we move towards the 8th every month & then starts to ease off through the rest of the month, to start again on the first. You know, unless there's a holiday or something, then it can come out of nowhere.

I'm really hoping that after we get through this year of "firsts" things can start to ease off, that the pain won't be right on top of everything anymore. That maybe I can look at your pictures & not be filled with regret, pain & disbelief. It's just so hard right now.

I finished drawing & coloring my memorial tattoo yesterday, I'd post it here, but I don't want anyone to take it & I have a feeling that one person in particular might, so I'll wait & post a picture of my actual tattoo when it's done.